Friday, June 19, 2026

Polita Inozo's Great White Panic


Polita Inozo, a blue-skinned chibifolk woman, woke up early as the sun was rising. Slipping out of bed she stood before her full length mirror, completely nude. "I'm so sexy", she purred, running her hands up and down her naked body. She cupped her breasts, raising the left one up, then letting it drop before raising up the right one.

Up, down. Up, down. She stared at herself, enjoying the sight. Polita laughed. If she had a boyfriend he would surely enjoy this activity. She knew she did. Polita went to her closet and picked out a simple slip dress, then pulled it over her head. As far as clothing goes, she decided that was enough. Excepting a bow. She definitely needed one, so selected a pink one and tied up her long black hair. Finally she added some pearl earrings.

The four-foot-tall woman then packed a picnic basket. A bottle of water and some fruit. That should be enough for her excursion. According to her girlfriend Maite, her brother kept a boat down by the shore, not far from here. Though hidden under a tree slightly up the coast, with palm fronds covering it.

She read in the paper that a beachside resort was running a chibiladies' day and exotic alcoholic drinks were half price. She didn't get the chance to inquire as to whether or not she could borrow the boat. She would have asked Maite, and asked her to join her, except she was working all day today. She had a job dancing at the local chibiman gentlemen's club.

This is an establishment where Maite said she could get Polita a job. While Polita had no problem stripping for men, she wasn't a good dancer. She was actually kind of a klutz. Maite said she could serve drinks. There were other chibiwomen who served drinks while topless, and she didn't need to be able to dance to do that. Except the pay was a lot less. Turns out it was the dancers who made the real money.

"You could rake it in by giving hwelas", Maite insisted.

When Politia protested, Maite pointed out that her friend had previously bragged about how good she was at it. "You love going down", Maite said, remembering what her friend told her.

While she remembered correctly, Politia said that wasn't for money and that she isn't a galbo.

"Well, you can make a lot of chibidon, and I mean a lot. You might want to think about it". Maite said she didn't see anything wrong with it and felt like her friend was judging her. Because, yes, she did give head to men she didn't know from time to time. Though only for a big stack of chibidon.

Polita told her friend she would think about it. For now she had enough money to get by. She sold chibifruits and nuts that grew on her property, a small estate she inherited from her mother. Supposedly her mother had been eaten by a dragon. That is what the authorities told her so long ago. Apparently she was swallowed whole. Polita wasn't sure she believed it, but she never saw her mother again. That was when she was only 14 years old. Currently she was 21 and had lived on her inheritance since then, drawing it down over time.

Why her funds were running low. She enjoyed a life of leisure and wasn't eager to get a job, so told her Maite she might be interested at the end of the summer season. Which had only just begun. Her funds weren't low enough that it was time to panic. Besides, the warm weather was ideal for having fun.

She said goodbye to her chibibird, Loro. A fat green parrot-like creature that stood approximately 2 foot tall, or half her height. She didn't ask Loro if he wanted to come, as he was afraid of the water. And he was over 100 years old (having previously been her mother's pet). Which wasn't ancient for a chibibird, but he wasn't a youngling either.

The bird saw her and squawked, "tekoki!" Polita noticed he was visibly aroused.

Give a chibiomu a handjob one time, and it will never leave you alone! "Very well", Polita relented. She took hold of the old bird's chinpo and gave it a few yanks. Nothing. So she got to work, vigorously moving her hand up and down the shaft until Loro's needs were sated. The bird squawked loudly, ogazumu achieved.

Polita got a rag from the kitchen and cleaned up the pool of superuma. "Ugh!" she exclaimed, chucking the rag into the trash. She retrieved her red pocketbook that had some chibidons in it (for the drinks) and slipped it into the picnic basket. Then she departed her domicile, a bungalow on Chibi-Irie, a seaside village on the big island of Chibiairando. As she stepped though the door, Politia glanced back and noticed the bird was fast asleep, cooing softly in the warm sun streaming through the window next to its perch.

After descending the 2 stone steps in front of her house, Politia skipped down a cobblestone path lined with pink tulips, humming an old chibifolk song. It was a tune as old as the hills, taught to her by her mother. She got to the white picket fence and, after opening it, closed it behind her. She flipped a sign there to indicate that her business was closed. In case any customers came by looking for fruits and nuts. Which she had not picked in any case. That could wait.

Smelling the lilac in the air as a warm breeze blew, Polita smiled, anticipating the fun ahead. She turned and walked south down a path, passing a few other bungalows, the homes of her chibifolk neighbors. After walking south for 20 moments in chibitime, she reached a hidden dirt path. This was the path where, at the end, Maite's brother Iker hid his boat. Maite pointed it out to Polita the last time they walked this way. The beach was a short distance away.

Maite did caution Polita that Iker didn't want anyone messing with it. So they'd have to wait for a time convenient to him. Then he might take them for an excursion. She heard there was an island with sea turtles some chibimiles into the ocean. She would like to see that, but didn't have the courage to try to get there on her own. Why she would stick with her plan and follow the coast. That should be easy enough and ensure she wouldn't get lost.

She got to the boat and uncovered it, removing the palm fronds. What Iker didn't know couldn't bother him, she reasoned. She would use it, be gone for the day, and have it back by evening. He couldn't object or get mad because she would never tell him. And she would put everything back exactly as she found it. If he ever did find out, she'd offer to pleasure his inkei with a tekoki or burojobu. He'd quickly forget any objections with that offer on the table, Polita was confident.

After the craft was uncovered, she dragged it down to the water. It wasn't far. She placed her picnic basket in the bottom of the boat, then pushed it into the water. Finally she got in, sat down and picked up the oars. Using an oar to push off, the boat drifted out into the cove. Politia started to row. After exiting the cove she steered left. Now it should be easy. She could sit back and allow the current to guide her down the shore. She would be at the resort in no time, she was convinced.

The boat drifted parallel to the beach. This is just what she imagined would happen! Polita placed the oars into the bottom of the boat and sat back, enjoying the ride. Once in a while she drifted away from the shore and she had to use the oars to correct her course, but mostly it was just drifting. Polita munched on a green apple, enjoying the scenery. She passed on small beach on which some of her fellow chibifolk played. Blues, like her. But also Greens, Yellows and Purples. Both men and women, boys and girls.

A stacked purple chibiwoman with long violet hair noticed her and waved. "She's hot", Politia remarked. "I'd definitely be into her". But she didn't recognize her as someone she knew. Maybe she should steer toward the shore. The woman did smile, so she might be into a make out session? Polita decided to stick to her plan. Besides, when she tried to row toward the shore the current resisted, so she gave up.

Some time passed and the sun rose high in the sky. The shoreline got rocky. She didn't see anyone, so she decided to slip out of her dress and get some sun. The warm rays of the sun felt incredible on her bare skin. She gave her foofa a few rubs. Thinking of the purple woman's tits made her horny. She imagined they were kissing. After she brought herself to orgasm she felt tired.

"I'll close my eyes for a few minutes", Polita sighed. Soon she was asleep. Not that much time passed when she woke, due to a feeling that the boat was suddenly moving a lot faster. Looking around, Polita noticed that the shore was much more distant. And getting further away. Even though she was still moving parallel to the shore, she was (at the same time) moving farther away from it.

It wasn't time to panic yet. Polita reached for the oars, intending to use them to navigate closer to the coast. She stuck the oars in the water and felt the water moving swiftly, providing great resistance. Attempting to row despite the resistance, suddenly one oar was wrenched from her hand. Dropping into the water, it was quickly left behind.

"Peoji!" she screamed, cursing her misfortune. Now what? The shore was still visible, though much more distant. But she seemed to still be moving parallel to it. Hopefully the shore would jut out to meet her, or at least come closer? He hoped that was the case. Not knowing what to do, she decided she would just let things play out and trust that her luck would be good. Usually it was.

Reaching into her wicker basket, Polita took out her water. Holding it up, she read the label. The purple hued liquid said it was Genius Water, and was for smart people who want to stay hydrated. She remembered picking it out at the grocery store. The marketing caught her attention, which is why she decided to buy it, despite it being a little pricey.

Given that she was smart, obviously the water was for her. She took a few sips and found it to be quite warm. "Gross", the still nude chibiwoman exclaimed. Suddenly there was a jolt, as if something huge hit the bottom of her boat. The jolt was sudden, and actually lifted the boat a few inches out of the water. Caught off guard, Polita dropped the bottle before securing the cap and it spilled all over her dress, completely soaking it.

"What the frick!" Time passed and the sun began to set. The air grew chilly as a cool breeze began to blow. Clouds drifted overhead, darkening the landscape further. Some goosebumps appeared on the chibiwoman's skin and she decided she wanted to cover up. Except her dress was still quite wet. Polita had an idea. She took hold of her dress and held it over her head. "I'll make this breeze work for me", she declared.

It seemed to be working, though it was taking a long time. And her arms were growing tired. Suddenly the breeze picked up and a sudden gust ripped the fabric from her grip. Polita watched, horrified as her dress flew away like a kite in the wind. The chibiwoman screamed. "Kuso!" She watched as it disappeared into the clouds, completely gone. Now she felt as if she could cry.

Then she noticed it. An enormous blue-gray fin circling her vessel. A shark? It certainly appeared that was the case. What did it want with her? Polita forgot about crying. Now she was extremely worried. Worse yet, the shore had now completely vanished. What should she do now? Further and further she drifted. At least she felt as though that was what was happening. It was hard to tell what direction she was going with no point of reference.

Polita had heard that across the ocean there was a human settlement. Avoid the humans was a warning well known among the chibifolk. Though she had never seen one. Apparently they were giants. Would she eventually land on a foreign shore and possibly encounter a human giant? Perhaps. If she didn't become shark food first.

Polita looked around, scanning for the fin, but saw nothing. Maybe the shark left? Suddenly a ho-ho-ji-ro-za-me (great white shark) rose out of the water, only a few feet from her location. Its jaws snapped as it lunged. Polita quickly grabbed the remaining oar, thrusting it in the direction of the enormous snapping maw. The shark bit down, then started chomping, quickly chewing up the oar. The shark bit down on the side of the boat. Grabbing hold, it started to shake the craft back and forth violently.

Panicked, but with few options, Polita jabbed both of her thumbs into the shark's eyes. Just like that, the shark released its grip and slipped into the depths, taking a chunk of the boat with it. Now there was a gaping hole in the side the boat. As it bobbed up and down in the sea, saltwater sloshed into the boat. She emptied out the picnic basket and used it to bail out the water that entered. It worked, though not that well, given that the wicker was porous.

She continued to bail, even though her arms were tired. It wasn't long before they began to hurt. It seemed this was the end? Then, with a crack of thunder, it began to rain. The boat lurched, groaned, and began to sink. Polita didn't wait. She jumped out, plunging into the cold water. Then, turning around, she heaved the little craft over. The hull flipped with a hollow whomp, trapping a pocket of air beneath it. She clung to the slick underside, hauling herself up until she lay sprawled across the overturned boat, chest heaving. Rain hammered the sea around her as she drifted alone on her tiny island of wood.

The picnic basket was gone, along with her chibifruits and pocketbook. The rain continued to sting her freezing skin. The waves rocked her boat back and forth, threatening to sink it.

Finally the downpour ended, though the rain continued to fall lightly. Then not at all. She was so cold she continued to shiver as she clung tightly to the overturned vessel.

Eventually the clouds parted, revealing a pale full moon in the sky. Hours passed and Polita almost fell asleep. Hours passed and the sun began to rise. White clouds tinged with pink floated overhead as a yellow sun appeared on the horizon. Polita was about to give up. She was exhausted. She imagined herself slipping into the water and sinking into the depths.

Perhaps her eyes deceived her, but she could swear that she saw a sail appear on the horizon. A medium sized boat cut through the water, appearing to head directly toward her. She mustered her strength, sitting up she began to wave her arms, then to yell. Her voice was hoarse because her throat was parched due to a lack of drinkable water.

She was so thirsty, yet she continued to yell. The sailboat altered course slightly, coming more directly toward her. She had been seen. Polita folded her arms across her chest, realizing she was still quite naked. The sailboat continued its approach, finally pulling alongside her. She looked up, the sun nearly blinding her. She saw a handsome muscular young man with tousled brown hair wearing a green tank top.

The man was incredibly tall. More strange, his skin was a sickly pale pinkish and brown color. All over his body. She had never seen anything like it. Could this be a human? She didn't know what else could explain what she saw. But, while the human was quite tall, he was still smaller than she had imagined. Not a giant as she was told.

The man looked at her with bewilderment. He saw a child with skin that was unnaturally blue. Except she had the figure of a woman. He could see that plainly.

"Take my hands", the man said, reaching out to her over the side of the sailboat. His voice was booming and deep, frightening Polita. Though she had little choice. If the man decided to harm her, she had no defense, given her weakened condition.

So she reached up and the man grabbed her arms, pulling her over the side. She landed in a heap on the deck of the sailboat. "Thank you", Polita squeaked. The man left her there for a bit. Then she suddenly felt herself being lifted up and wrapped in a towel.

"What are you?" the perplexed man asked. But the small blue woman with the overly large head and eyes didn't answer. She sank back to the deck and lay there, exhausted. Unable to keep her eyes open, Polita fell asleep.

Some time later she woke. The boat rocked gently in the ocean. Opening her eyes she saw the man crouched in front of her. "You must be one of the chibifolk?" he asked. The man introduced himself as Nathan Pescatore, a fisherman. "My father read me some stories as a child about chibifolk. But the stories were works of fiction. Or so I thought".

Nathan gave Polita a bottle of water and she took a small sip. It seemed this human was friendly. Or he might be trying to lull her into a false sense of security? At first she imagined that the man might want to cook and eat her. But it seemed her very existence amazed him. As his existence amazed her. Nathan offered her some bread to eat.

Polita ate the bread and drank more of the water. Then she told him what happened.

"A great white shark?" Nathan didn't seem to believe her tale. And a riptide? But, upon considering what she said, Nathan decided it was plausible. "You were lost at sea for 2 days?" Nathan asked.

Suddenly Polita was worried. "No. Much longer. I'm an explorer. I've been island hopping for many months. My community is actually far, far away. Way to far for you to reach. Besides, I won't tell you the way". It was better to be safe than sorry. If humans found out about the chibifolk, they might want to invade and take what they have. She had heard that humanfolk were violent. Also giants. Though the giant part turned out to not be accurate.

This one didn't seem violent, but what about his kin? Nathan told her he was from a fishing village about a day from their current location. He wasn't actually fishing, but searching for the Krymmeno Nisi, which was a fabled hidden island. According to his map, it was located in this general location.

Nathan gave Polita a clean T-shirt for her to wear. She used a length of twine as a belt, tying it around her waist for a belt. Then she sat on a crate.

"Take a look at this", Nathan said, unfurling a brittle yellowing parchment. "Perhaps, being an explorer, you will see something I missed".

Polita didn't know anything about maps, but decided she was obligated to pretend she did. "This is completely wrong", the chibiwoman concluded after studying it for some time. "This isn't at all how a chibi cartographer would make it. I can't make heads or tails of this nonsense". This seemed like a believable lie. She smiled, proud of herself for recalling the fancy word for a map drawer. Then she handed the map back to Nathan. "Sorry".

"Ah, well, I am pretty sure I'm in the general location", Nathan replied taking back the map. "It should be here", he said, pointing to a blank area on the map. "The island isn't on the map, but this is where it should be. The Roman woman I purchased it from gave me the cipher to translate these runes around the edges.

Polita didn't really understand what he was talking about, but nodded in agreement. "So, what do you plan to do next?" she asked. Perhaps he could take her home. But then she would need to tell her the direction. It wasn't but a few days back in the opposite direction. She guessed but wasn't sure. This certainly was a conundrum. She would have to think on it. Right now it seemed there was no easy answer as to how she was going to get back home.

Nathan ate some bread and dried fish, then drank from a flask. He grimaced when he drank it, but concluded that it was the good skata, regardless. Polita suspected what he drank was alcohol. This reminded her of the sweet alcoholic drinks she had planned on purchasing after drifting down the coast.

"Can I have some?" she inquired.

"This is an adult beverage, not for a youngling such as yourself". Nathan screwed the cap back on the flask and slipped it into his pocket.

"Pffft!" Polita replied. "I'm not that young. My age is 21 chibiyears".

Nathan didn't know what a chibiyear was. It sounded similar to human years. Nathan revealed he was 19. Though that didn't mean he was younger and she was older. Nathan looked at Polita incredulously. Could she be? He decided she could be. Given that the chibifolk were short. She could be an adult and actually older than him. He asked if she had consumed alcohol previously. Politia confirmed that she had. Many times. So Nathan passed her the flask.

"That's some potent stuff", he cautioned. "So don't drink too much".

Polita accepted the flask and, after unscrewing the cap, took a big swig. Only because the human had cautioned her not to. "Wow!" she exclaimed. Her throat burned and her eyes watered. But it tasted good, she decided. So she took a second drink. "That really is some strong kuso!"

She quickly took a few more gulps, draining the flask. Nathan was amazed. Polita asked if he had more, and Nathan confirmed that he did. He said he had a supply in a barrel below decks and went to get more. Soon the pair was thoroughly intoxicated.

Polita thought about the age difference. "How long is a human year?" she asked. According to Nathan a human year measured the amount of time it took the Earth to travel around the sun. Polita considered this and decided what Nathan told her made no sense at all.

"What do you mean? The world going somewhere in relation to the sun seemed pretty dumb. "It is common knowledge that the sun moves across the sky. It's the sun that moves, not the land". This guy could be that stupid?

Nathan was intrigued. He asked her to explain. As per what she said, The warm ocean currents brought with them higher temperatures that lasted 400 days, after which cooler weather accompanied colder currents. This was a cycle of 400 chibidays of warmer weather followed by 300 chibidays of cooler weather. And that cycle made up one chibiyear. And she was 21 chibiyears old.

Nathan considered this. He did some math in his head, concluding this meant that Politia was actually over 40 years old.

"No, way", Polita replied. "40 isn't that old, but it is more than twice my current age. I'm slightly older than you, like I said. I could show you my identification card, but it was in my purse, which was lost in the shark attack".

Nathan decided to let the subject drop. But he did continue to think about the implications. This small woman was almost as old as his mother. Apparently. What she said, in regards to how she measured time, made sense. So it must be the case that she was over 40. In real years. As opposed to chibiyears.

"Hey, I've been thinking", Polita said after a few more drinks. Given our closeness in age, it would be not inappropriate at all for us to screw". Polita hoped she hadn't shocked Nathan, but she was suddenly very horny.

Nathan confessed he had thought about it. Ever since he saw her completely naked body. Which he said was very sexy. But because she was younger, he pushed those thoughts from his mind. But now, given this new information, he was thinking about it again.

"Then it's settled", Polita concluded. "My confession is that I've been wondering what it looks like. Your inkei, I mean". Polita blushed. But decided directness was the best course of action, if she was going to get what she wanted. Which was a bit of bouncy-bouncy on Nathan's inkei.

Nathan stood and pulled down his cargo shorts. "Here you go", he said, handling it.

Polita approached. "Magnificent", she said. "Not grotesque at all. I was thinking it might be". Polita took hold and started to massage it. Nathan moaned, then let out a gasp when Polita gave it a long lick. Starting with the fuguri and dragging her tongue up the shaft. Then she kissed the tip for a while before swallowing as much as she could take.

Nathan ground his genitals against her face, grabbing hold of the chibiwoman's silky black locks.

"I want you inside me", Polita exclaimed after removing Nathan's inkei from her mouth and swallowing. A small dribble of seieki ran down her chin. Nathan sat on the deck of the sailboat and Polita stood over his lap. Then she lowered her body down onto his engorged inkei. Feeling the tip, she continued to press down. First there was resistance, then it slipped in, her gein stretching to accommodate it's width.

Nathan groaned loudly. Polita lowered herself all the way, feeling Nathan's okisa push deep inside her. This was unlike any previous sexual experience. The chibiwoman began to bounce up and down. First shallow, then deep. Then shallow followed by deep again. Over and over. This went on for some time. She shuttered as waves of rapturous pleasure flowed though her body. Eventually she came several times before Nathan also orgasmed.

When finished, Polita lay sweaty in Nathan's embrace. The chibiwoman was more content in that moment that she had ever been in her life. Was this what love felt like? Moonlight bathed the deck of the sailboat. Polita's small frame on top of the human's larger body. She grabbed hold of his shoulders and pulled herself up. Then were face to face, and kissed. Deeply and passionately.

Nathan also thought he might be in love, which was strange, given that he had only known this woman a few days. What would his parents think if he brought home a diminutive blue woman with a strangely large head and large blue eyes? Obviously this wasn't an option and presented a serious problem. If their relationship was to continue. But that was a future problem, as opposed to a now problem. So he pushed it out of his mind and continued making out with the small blue woman.

They kissed for some time more before falling asleep. But first Polita decided she wanted to handle it some more, and did so. She was truly entranced. This, she decided while massaging it with both hands, would be hers and at her disposal whenever she wanted to enjoy the pleasure it brought. She had never been more sure of anything in her life.

Realistically, the chibi woman and the human fisherman probably would speak different languages. But having them both speak and understand English was a lot more convenient for the story, Nathan Williams, the author, decided.

He liked where this was going. Now what? Nathan decided that Polita suggests they try anal. And Nathan comes up with the idea that they use olive oil to lubricate the chibiwoman's butthole.

Nathan wrote that down. This will be a good place to pick up the second part of the story, which will have the couple finding and exploring the island. Also having a lot more sex. Polita is willing to do absolutely anything to please the Nathan in the story. Given that he, as her creator, could have her do anything he wanted.

Quite unlike with his ex-wife. She never wanted to try new things in bed, Nathan reflected ruefully. He couldn't make her do anything.

He wasn't sure where his story was going, but did decide that telegraphing a happy ending would make the story less interesting. So he had to at least make it seem that the chibiwoman might want to return home.

Nathan could see the story getting a bit lengthy. This might end up being the first chapter in a chibi-themed romance novel. Chicks liked those, so he might have come up with some ideas for additional chapters that could be compiled into a steamy bestseller featuring Polita the chibi woman and Nathan the human fisherman finding love and having adventures. And banging frequently.



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Wednesday, June 03, 2026

Erotic Chibi Tales By Nathan Williams


Nathan the Red Chibi Monkey saw the female he desired, another Red (like him) but with luxurious curly pink hair. Also firm round breasts and a hairless foofa. On the tree branch next to her was a Purple Chibi Monkey, which was showing off its large hot dog. Nathan could see she was impressed, but his was larger. He hoped to a branch directly opposite her where he knew she could see him.

Then he started pumping his monkey meats, inflating his equipment to its maximum length. This, he was convinced, would impress her. It wasn't long before he got confirmation. As he played with himself, he noticed her looking over and smiling. Nathan was confident that the female would choose him, but worried he might have to fight the rival to get what he wanted, which was her sweet, sweet foofa.

He started hooting and hollering, in order to get the male's attention. The male looked over and got the message. Nathan could see the worry on the purple's face, so he quickened his pace. A few seconds later he shot a powerful stream of gooey monkey juice in the direction of the male. A direct hit! This really enraged the male.

The purple leapt through the air, grabbed hold of the branch Nathan sat on, swung around, and landed quite close. Nathan turned to face purple. He acted quickly, grabbing a banana and slapping purple in the face with it. Purple cried out in surprise, lost his footing and fell to the ground many feet below. He lay dazed.

That is when Nathan decided to claim his prize. He leapt over gracefully to the branch directly across where the Red Chibi female still crouched.

"That was quite impressive", she remarked, smiling.

Nathan noticed that she was staring at his member.

"Can I touch it?" the female inquired.

Nathan consented and she took hold of his hot dog. Gently at first, then she really got a grip on it and went to town, moving her hand up and down the shaft while cradling his balls. He had to confess that this was even better than he had imagined when he first saw the female. After they had intercourse Nathan introduced himself.

"That was very nice, Nathan", the female replied. Then she introduced herself. "My name is Melinda, but you can call me Mel. By the way, that was Aubergine, my ex". Nathan deduced that she was referring to Purple. He worried that would be a problem, and Melinda confirmed that it possibly could.

"He was trying to win me back", Mel explained, sighing. "But I told him no. I've actually had my eye on you for some time and was hoping you'd make a move". Mel smiled at him, then reached for his member again. "I'm really glad you did", she added as she started massaging it once more.

Nathan Williams, a man and not a monkey, finished typing. That's a good start to a story, he thought. Though not one for children, obviously. This clearly was material not suited for his 8-year-old son, Ethan. What might be a good title for this anthology? Perhaps Chibi Tales After Dark? He would have to ponder it.

He looked at the images he had had his AI assistant mock up for him. "Captain Pilot, make me a sexy blue chibifolk woman in a boat lost at sea. A great white shark should be in the background".

Captain Pilot created some variations for him and he chose the one that turned out the best. But maybe the images should be inside the book and a tamer image should be on the cover? Nathan decided that was the way to go, given that some prudes might classify the images as too risqué for display in a book store.

Nathan decided to outline the story. The chibi woman finds a boat and decides to take it for a joyride in the sea. She heard a tropical beach with fantastic white sands and clear blue-tinged waters where sweet alcoholic drinks were half price was just down the coast. This particular vessel belonged to her brother's friend. But he wouldn't mind if she borrowed it. If she got it back later in the day he would never even know.

But she gets caught in a riptide, drops the oars, and is swept out to sea. The sun beat down, causing her to sweat profusely, so she removed her clothing. Luckily she did bring a bottle of Genius Water. The label read, for smart people who want to stay hydrated. "I'm smart, and I need some hydration", Polita remarked, reading the label.

She took a swig, but it was warm and she spit it out. "Gross!" Then she dropped it and the remainder spilled into the bottom of the boat. She drifted further out to sea as the sun set. Polita had heard that across the ocean there was a human settlement. Avoid the humans was a warning well known among the chibi folk. Though she had never seen one. Apparently they were giants.

Suddenly the wind began to blow. It got really cold and the nude chibi woman started shivering, so she reached for her dress, though it was soaked with the Genius Water. Polita held it up, hoping to use the blowing air to dry it quickly. Instead the wind grabbed her dress, ripping it from her hands and it blew away.

"Peoji!" she screamed, cursing her misfortune.

Later she encounters a human fisherman and, of course, there is a sexual encounter. That would be a good start Nathan decided. Polita will be very intrigued by the fishman and grateful when he saves her. And willing to do absolutely anything he asks of her. Sexually, that is. Which is where the fishman's mind goes when he sees she is completely nude. Not because, compared to him, she is small like a child.

That would be very inappropriate. But what transpired next would be completely consensual and both the fisherman and Polita would be willing participants. Polita would do things with the fisherman's zizi that he never imagined a woman would be willing to do. The author decided his fisherman character should also be named Nathan, the same as the red monkey with the huge schlong.

Then Nathan looked at the 3rd cover mockup. Captain Pilot made the blue chibi man and green frog characters he requested as a blue chibi man with a frog head. He danced nude in a field with his smaller frog buddy, a cool red corvette parked in the background. Prince Nathan, amphibian royalty, had just received the classic car as a birthday gift.

He could have just turned 4. According to the search engine g00gle, frogs sexually mature at 4, which would explain his huge amplexus. He was sexually mature and eager to mate. But Nathan decided against this. Given that this was a chibi frog, he decided Nathan (the frog) would be 18. Which would cause no issues due to saying a 4 year old was going cruising for chicks. Also g00ble said frogs don't have frog units.

"You learn something new every day", Nathan remarked. But that could be misinformation. Regardless, he decided that chibi frogs absolutely were completely and fully equipped. Also, Nathan the frog prince was anatomically correct. Or incorrect, if he was to believe g00gle. Before departing Nathan the frog grabbed a large stack of amphibucks from his birthday loot.

"This should be more than enough to hire some hos to orally pleasure us", Nathan informed his buddy Zorrotada. Then he changed his mind. It was Zorrotada who proposed hiring the hos and Nathan the frog prince who objected. "That would be the morally incorrect thing to do", Nathan remarked, sad his buddy would suggest such a thing.

"Women are our equals, not sex objects for us to take advantage of". He slapped his buddy Zorro on the back of the head. "Grow up", he counseled his shorter frog buddy. Though, while shorter, Zorro was actually older. So he should know better. Nathan typed that in, satisfied with his decision. Nathan (his frog alter ego) would find a willing sexual partner who was willing and eager to get her freak on and break in his huge amplexus.

Once the hypothetical partner saw it, she would want it inside her as soon as possible. Though the encounter wouldn't remain hypothetical for long. And there might be more than one chibi frog woman wanting to sexually please Nathan the frog prince. Probably two at once while several more females watched, each one waiting to take her turn.

They would also be quite impressed with his corvette. In addition to the fact that he was a prince and the possibility existed that one lucky amphilass could become his princess. And eventually queen. But he would have to be clear upfront that was only a possibility. Due to wanting to completely avoid a hypergamous union. Instead Nathan was looking for true love and not a woman that would divorce him and take half his stuff. Like Nathan's real ex-wife.

But Nathan the frog prince would definitely sow his wild oats first. By getting BJs and having intercourse with dozens (and possibly more) willing amphilass women first. He was a young frog and there was plenty of time before he even had to think about settling down.

Nathan, the human author, recently arranged a meet the author event at a local book store that had not gone well. He paid the owner of Bernard's Book Barn $200 to set up for the afternoon. He printed up flyers and distributed them around town, hopeful that people would line up to buy copies of his self published book, Chibi Tales Volume One. It included a rejiggered version of his story about Lois Ailana and Stitcher the blue chibi beast.

Nathan brought all the copies he paid to have printed, hoping that 100 would be enough. He considered that, as the copies depleted, he would raise the price. He set up a table and hand printed a sign indicating that the price was $24.99 each. Though he also had a sharpie in his pocket. Both for autographing copies (for an extra $50) and to cross off the $24.99 price and write in a higher price.

But the hours ticked by until the owner, an elegant older woman named Cordelia Barrowbower, approached him. "It is time for you to leave".

Except he had sold zero copies. A child came over and opened one up. Nathan was concerned the child would damage the volume. On the other hand, he didn't wish to discourage a possible sale. He asked the boy if his mother was around. The child pointed at the cover and said the name of the trademarked character from the company represented by a mouse.

Nathan was annoyed. "No, that is my completely original character, Stitcher".

"Mommy, it's snitch!" the child exclaimed.

The mother came over to see what her child was talking about. She took the book from her son and looked at it. "How can you use this copyrighted character?"

"There is no copyrighted character called Snitch. This is a story about my original chibi character named Stitcher. Do you wish to purchase a copy? I will sign it for free". Nathan grabbed his sign and crossed off the line that indicated author autographs were $50 and wrote in free.

"No thank you", the mother replied, placing the book back on the table. Then she grabbed her child by the wrist and left.

That is when Nathan decided a different tact was in order. Instead of a book for children, he would switch gears and write a new volume for an adult audience. Either Chibi Tales After Dark, or possibly Erotic Chibi Tales. This would be a work that would surely sell better. At least he hoped so. He already had some ideas for steamy scenes involving randy lust-filled chibis and their 100 percent consensual sexual exploits.

 swtd-451ntw-3 AnalysisPreviousNext.

Sunday, May 17, 2026

Little Bunny Foo Foo's Comeuppance


Greta looked on, disappointed in her former friend, Foo. Not that long ago he started juicing, telling his friend he was tired of being a wimp. Then, for reasons that made no sense to her, Foo started scooping up field mice and bopping them on the head. It seems he took a perverse delight in inflicting misery on the lesser creatures of the forest.

"It's roid rage", Greta concluded, but Foo refused to listen. Then he pushed her and, when she tried to grab him, bit her arm. Greta cried as Foo stormed out. He grabbed his bopping stick and left the home they shared.

She didn't see him again for many weeks. One day Greta was walking through the forest when she saw Foo. He held his bopping stick in one hand while slapping the opposite end into the palm of his hand.

Field mice emerged from the woods. Each one had a bandaged head. Obviously these were bopping injuries. The mice looked angry. It seemed they had had enough and were determined to stand up to the bully, Foo.

But Foo didn't seem worried. "I can do a lot worse than give you a bop on the head", Foo said, laughing. He was going to have some fun putting these insolent rodents in their place.

Suddenly the mob bum rushed him, swarming him in an instant and completely taking Foo off guard.

When it was over Foo lay on the ground, covered in bites and scratches. After the mice departed Greta approached her friend. Was he dead? A small trickle of blood dripped from the corner of his mouth. His eyes fluttered open when he felt his friend's touch.

"My friend", he whispered. Greta helped him up and took him home, Foo hobbling, leaning on Greta and using his stick to support himself.

Some time later, after Greta nursed Foo back to health, he reconsidered his past actions. "Those damn mice beat me up good", he concluded, sighing.

"Perhaps it's time to make peace", Greta said, counseling her friend.

"Maybe", Foo agreed reluctantly. "On the other hand, I could get some more steroids, juice up, and get my revenge!"

Greta didn't think that was a good idea and said so, trying to talk her friend out of this course of action. Instead of arguing, Foo agreed to give it some thought.

But he had already made up his mind. Later that night, after a meal of carrot soup and some time cuddling on the couch watching Netflix, Greta turned in for the night. Foo pretended he was going to turn in as well. He went to his room and sat on his bed waiting.

When he heard Greta's snores from the next room, he got up and snuck into the kitchen. This is where Greta kept her purse. Reaching in, he found her pocketbook and opened it, removing the cash he found inside. Then he crept into Greta's bedroom and raided her jewelry box.

Leaving the house, he examined his take under a moonlit sky. This, he concluded, would be enough to buy more steroids from his supplier. Then the mice would pay dearly. He wouldn't just bop them on the head lightly for fun, as he had in the past. This time he would strike with all his might and seriously crack some skulls.

 swtd-450ant-4 AnalysisPreviousNext.

Saturday, January 03, 2026

The Inappropriate Bedtime Story


"Can you tell me a bedtime story, Dad"?

Nathan Williams, a divorced dad, sat down on a chair next to his eight-year-old offspring's mattress.

"Of course, son". He thought, digging deep into his imagination. Then he began.

There was a beautiful Hawaiian woman named Lois. One evening, when she was walking on a starlit beach wearing a sexy red bikini, she noticed a falling star.

That is when she decided to make a wish. And so she did. She wished for her life to be more interesting.

Now Lois, I should tell you, was a looker. A little over 20, so completely legal. She has a glowing complexion with creamy brown skin and long silky jet black hair. She also has an hourglass figure, if you know what I mean. Which means she is stacked and rocking some junk in the trunk.

Anyway, Lois walks along the beach near her home in Hawaii, like I said. She lives in a bungalow right on the beach, so I don't know what she is complaining about or why she longs for her life to be more interesting.

But, for the purposes of the story, let's say she is very bored for some reason. Well, that is about to change. This very night, in fact.

She was almost home when, to her surprise, she encounters a small blue chibi monster. The creature wears a chrome colored space suit that gleams under the glittering moonlit sky.

"Good evening, mam. I am a lost traveler and was wondering if you could offer assistance?" is what the chibi says.

Lois was taken aback. A talking chibi, in real life? Could it be a drunken hallucination? Or perhaps she decided to try those psychedelic mushrooms her uncle gave her?

She decided that must be it. She scarfed the mushrooms and was currently tripping balls. Oh, also I forgot to mention that earlier Louis was jogging along the beach. It was like the opening of Baywatch when the hot lifeguard babe runs in slow motion, while her tits are bouncing.

But back to the alien chibi. What he claims is that he and his family from Alpha Centauri were sightseeing on Earth when their spacecraft started having engine troubles. What I mean is that the family is humanoid, and Stitcher was like the family pet.

Oh, and he says his name is Stitcher. Also that the Mom, Dad and son alien died in the crash. They were completely vaporized when their ship exploded. Though Stitcher jumped out right before that happened.

Now he was really ticked off, more so than sad. He barely knew those people, it turns out. They had just adopted him from the space pound and he thought the son was kind of a turd.

What he was angry about was being stuck on a backwater planet like Earth. Also, he was tired and hungry.

"You have a place near here where you can hook me up with some grub?"

Stitcher said he could pay. Then he removed a ruby-studded collar from around his neck. Instantly Lois was captivated. Because, you know, chicks love expensive jewelry.

So Lois agreed to help. Her place was right there, in fact. She lived alone, having inherited the oceanside bungalow from her dad, who died in a car crash a few years ago.

"But I loved my dad. So, it is unlike the situation with you and your family".

That is what she told Stitcher as she made him a sandwich. He went on about how he might be happy that his owners were dead, if that didn't involve him being stuck on a jerkwater like Earth.

Lois went to the closet and got a blanket. She told Stitcher he could spend the night on her living room couch. So he did, after removing his space suit.

Lois sat on the couch and flipped on her TV. What was on was that Real Housewives show. That's the kind of garbage TV women like. Stitcher sat next to her.

"You are very cute", she said as she gave him some pets. This is due to Stitcher being a chibi. Not because she was sexually attracted to him or anything.

Well, the next morning Lois is in for the shock of her life when she discovers that what happened the night before wasn't a psychedelic head trip, but real life.

The evidence was right in front of her. Which was an alien creature curled up asleep on her couch. She was about to go for her morning run and swim in the ocean when she noticed Stitcher, snoring. Right there on her couch.

"I was hoping it was a bad dream", the alien said, stretching his arms and yawning. "You wax down there?" he asked. Well, obviously the answer was yes, as he could see. Given that Lois was completely naked.

"I just got out of the shower when I heard snoring", the nude woman explained. She didn't feel self conscious, due to people usually not caring about being naked around pets.

Though she noticed Stitcher was staring at her, which did make her uncomfortable. So she put on a robe. It was a silky pink number that didn't conceal much.

Just then there was a knock at the door. It is a government agent named Snake Pliskinowitz. He's a Man in Black, investigating the alien sighting. Also, his superiors tracked the ship on radar.

"I'm from the national weather service. I'm looking for a downed weather balloon", he lied. Snake, a large African American man, left his card and asked Lois to call him if she saw something like a weather balloon. Or anything at all suspicious.

Snake lowered his Ray-Bans to get a better look at Lois, standing there in her doorway wearing the several-sizes-too-small pink robe.

"I'll do that", she replied as she accepted his card, then closed the door. Clearly this agent was looking for Stitcher. This is quite interesting, Lois thought, remembering her wish on the shooting star.

Though, perhaps, instead of a shooting star, what she saw was the alien spaceship exploding? She decided that seemed most likely.

Stitcher, curious about who was at the door, asked Lois who it was.

"A jackbooted government thug obviously looking for you", she replied. "I don't want trouble, so perhaps you should go".

Stitcher held up the ruby collar, which he hadn't given to Lois yet. He speculated it was worth a lot in her Earth currency. In fact, the value of it was quite significant.

Ethan interrupted his father. "But what will she do with it? She can't sell it, because she can't explain how she came by it".

Nathan considered what his son said. "I suppose you have a point, son". What would Lois do with a valuable piece of jewelry she couldn't sell? He was going to have her greedily accept the ruby collar, seeing only dollar signs. Though, she might be dumb and not realize it would be difficult to exchange for cash.

Nathan decided. "Lois takes the ruby collar and agrees to help Stitcher".

But he could see his son wasn't believing this turn of events.

"I'll accept this ruby collar and help you, provided I can fence it", Lois concluded. "My uncle might know a guy".

Stitcher looked disappointed, but agreed. Though he snapped the collar around his neck, then fluffed his fur over it, concealing its presence. "I'll hold on to it for now. It's no biggie to me, by the way. Rubies are plentiful in my universe and not that valuable. But I heard they are worth a lot here".

But Lois had other concerns. If Stitcher was stuck on Earth due to his ship exploding, did that mean he wanted to live with her permanently? Or for an extended period of time? How long did he think he could stay here? Because the government was obviously looking for his spaceship.

Stitcher decided to come clean. "My family's saucer wasn't vaporized. They landed for a picnic and that's when I murdered them. Though, Mr. Gleepglorp, right before he died, disabled the saucer. Otherwise I'd be outta here already".

Stitcher noticed a look of alarm on Lois's face. So he assured her she had nothing to worry about. He explained that the Gleepglorps were bad people. Anyway, the long and short of it was that Mr. Gleepglorp, realizing he was about to die -- and after seeing his wife and son brutally murdered by Stitcher, who, not to get too graphic, slashed their throats with his sharp claws -- smashed the flying saucer's power crystal.

So Stitcher, who insisted he could pilot the ship, was out of luck unless he could get a replacement power crystal. A power crystal replacement? Lois didn't know if she could help Stitcher with that. Or if she wanted to, given his shocking confession.

I'll skip ahead here a bit and say that Lois contacted her uncle who said he knew a guy who could fence the rubies for a 50 percent cut. And launder her cut for another 30 percent, leaving her with 20 percent. A man came, examined the collar and concluded it was worth 2 million dollars, though said the best he could do was four hundred thousand dollars, clean money.

As it turned out, Lois was an artist and had her own studio. So the man said a friend would commission her to create a unique piece of art. It could be something she already had. They went to her studio downtown and he pointed to an abstract painting. "I'll have someone pick it up and pay in cash". His cover is that he is a representative for a wealthy Saudi who saw Lois featured in a snooty art magazine and decided he had to have a Lois Ailana original.

Nathan took out his phone and checked a search engine. "That's a Hawaiian last name", he told his son. And Lois Ailana was in an art magazine recently as a Hawaiian artist. So everything checks out and it is all very plausible.

After that Lois and Stitcher buried the bodies and hid the spaceship. Lois noticed that the slaughtered alien family looked quite human. Except they had green skin and bug eyes. Stitcher, before they buried Mr. Gleepglorp, removed a set of keys from his pocket. Then he went to the spaceship, after rolling Gleepglorp into his grave and shoveling earth over his body, opened the trunk.

"Here are the raw materials for constructing a new power crystal", Stitcher commented. There were three burlap sacks, each one filled with a strange glowing powder. He explained that what he needed to do was mix them up and compress them under an incredible weight for a few weeks, and *presto* they would form a new power crystal.

"Here is the machine that can do the compressing", Stitcher explained, patting a strange machine that was also in the trunk. He opened a cap on top of the machine, poured in some crystals, closed the cap, and flipped a switch. A green light on the machine lit up and it started humming. Presumably the compression process was initiated.

"Is that it?" Lois asked.

"Well, like I said, it will take a few weeks, but yes. Gleepglorp didn't know I was aware he was a black market crystal smuggler. These powders are invaluable", Stitcher remarked, pointing to the glowing crystalline substance in the sacks. Then he closed the trunk. After that he and Lois covered the small saucer (about the size of a compact car) with bamboo stalks that Stitcher cut down using his sharp retractable claws. And also some palm fronds, concealing the ship.

Lois was sweaty and tired, but they continued working though the night under the stars. After they were finished, Lois stood back and examined their handiwork. "Lucky for you this is public land, held in trust by the Kamehameha Schools. I think it should stay hidden".

Stitcher held the keyring. Then extended it and clicked a button on a small black box. He explained that he activated the cloak, so that should help as well. But, without the power crystal, it is running on reserve power. "I don't know how long it will last, but not weeks".

Lois got her 400 thousand, wired into her account instead of cash. The bank looked into it and concluded (incorrectly) the transfer was totally on the up and up. Then she and Stitcher spent the next few weeks hanging out on the beach. Lois brought a large cooler Stitcher could crawl into if they saw anyone. That way they kept an eye on the hidden saucer.

One day, after Lois emerged from the surf and stuck her board in the sand, then laid out in the sun, Stitcher opened up to her. That's when the real truth came out. As it turns out, the Gleepglorps were not just picnicking on Earth. They had come for a reason. The reason was to snatch a human child.

"Oh, my!" Lois exclaimed. "For what reason?"

Stitcher said they wanted a human child for a pet. "They had one previously, but it got sick and died. That was before they adopted me. But I saw the pictures. I asked about them, and the son, Ollie, told me that was his old pet, Matt. It seems Matt fell ill with some alien flu and couldn't be saved. They took him to the vet, but it was no use. If you get the langour it's fatal 9 out of 10 times. For humans".

"Turns out I was a replacement pet. But Ollie decided I wasn't good enough. I found out when the picnic was over. Everyone piled into the saucer. When I tried to get in, Stan said, not you, Stitcher. You're staying here. We're off to pick up a replacement human youngling elsewhere on the island. Ollie doesn't want you anymore".

"That's when I lost it. I cried out to Ollie. He jumped out of the saucer and laughed. Then he wiggled his behind and did a dance as he continued laughing. That's when I flew a rage".

Stitcher has retractable claws, similar to Wolverine. Nathan decided that sounded cool. He ran right at Ollie and slashed at his abdomen, slicing him open and spilling his intestines. Ollie's mom, Gladys, screeched, as chicks do. Even alien ones. She ran to her son. But that was her error. Stitcher made mincemeat of her with another slash of a razor sharp claw.

For the record, he had never revealed he had these claws before. He kept them secret. Ordinarily chibi don't have such claws, but Stitcher, unknown to the Gleepglorps, was the subject of forbidden genetic experiments. Anyway, as was revealed previously, the dad was the last to go, but he removed the saucer power crystal from the dashboard first and smashed it. He didn't want Stitcher to take the saucer and escape Earth.

Stitcher sniffed. "So that's the whole ugly story. I lost my temper". Then he thought about it. "But I did save a human youngling from being taken as a pet". This, he decided, sounded like a good justification for what he did.

Lois decided she didn't care about the murdered alien family who had planned to take a human child as a pet. If what Stitcher told her was true, and she believed it was. Stitcher opened up to her and what he said seemed genuine to her.

Just then Lois notices a man walking along the beach. He really stands out, due to being quite tall and muscular. Also because he is wearing a black suit instead of beach attire. Stitcher crawled into the cooler to hide as the man drew near. Lois recognized him as Snake Pliskinowitz, the man who said he was looking for a weather balloon, but was surely a government agent. One of those men in black, like in the movie with Will Smith. This was like 20 years before you were born. So, well before he slapped Chris Rock.

Snake drew near. He loomed over Lois, stretched out on her towel and wearing her sexy red bikini. He stood there and said nothing. He just stared at her.

"Did you find the weather balloon?" Lois asked, smiling while Stitcher hid in the cooler.

"No, I did not", Snake replied. Then he fell silent again, not elaborating or making any small talk.

Lois was growing uncomfortable, but decided to remain calm. What did this government man want?

"You have any cool drinks in there?" Snake asked, wiping sweat from his brow. "It is so hot today".

"In my cooler? No, sorry, I just cracked open the last one". Lois held up a brightly colored soda can.

Snake eyed the can. "Can I have a drink?"

Snake took the can and drank the contents in one gulp. "This is warm".

Lois said the ice in her cooler melted. That explained the warm soda. When the real explanation is that there had never been any ice, of course.

"I heard that someone saw something up the beach. I'm here to investigate", Snake remarked as he handed the empty can to Lois. "A citizen I interviewed said they saw flashing lights about 2 weeks back in this area. They assumed it was a falling star".

Now Lois was starting to panic. Would Snake find the hidden alien saucer?

"This same person said they noticed you spending much more time on the beach. Much more time than normal".

Lois explained that she was doing a lot of surfing to enter a competition. But Snake looked suspicious. He nodded and walked away, heading up the beach in the direction of the concealed saucer.

Ethan looked concerned. "Is the jig up, dad?"

"It looks like it, son", Nathan replied. Which is the same thing Stitcher concluded. So he silently removed the lid of the cooler and, after looking around and seeing nobody else on the beach, ran up behind the government agent, leaping on his back, and then using his claws to slash his throat. Snake Pliskinowitz, gurgling as blood gushed from his open carotid artery, fell to his knees. He quickly bled out and, his eyelids fluttering, died.

Lois, being a chick, started freaking out. She cried and fretted, concerned about going to prison as an accessory to homicide. Or worse, government agents would, when they captured Stitcher, spirit her away to some black site for interrogation and then imprisonment. But Stitcher persuaded her to calm down. He said that what is done is done.

Then he suggested that Lois accompany him. He knew of a planet in Alpha Centauri B that was almost exactly like earth. Except it was a total paradise. The Gleepglorps traveled to Earth instead because it was free to picnic on Earth and they were total cheapskates. Why they decided to snatch a human child for a pet themselves, instead of buying one on the black market.

However, Stitcher explained, after he sold the crystals they could live like kings on Canis Planeta, which was the name of the planet that was very much like Hawaii. Though the inhabitants intensely disliked insectoids, which the Gleepglorps were. Their kind was banned from the planet.

Lois worried, concerned about leaving her entire life behind. But it seemed she had little choice. Stitcher agreed there was enough time for her to return home and gather a few prized possessions. Though, knowing how chicks overpack, he reminded her there was not much room in the saucer. One suitcase only, he said. Lois reluctantly agreed. She couldn't believe she was leaving Earth, possibly forever. But she had wished for her life to be more interesting, and this definitely fit the bill.

"It is getting late son, so perhaps I should wrap this up", Nathan interjected. Seeing as how engrossed Ethan was, he suggested they continue the story on another night.

"At least let me know if Lois and Stitcher leave Earth together", Ethan begged.

Nathan agreed this sounded reasonable. So he confirmed that they did. Continuing on he summed up their departure. There is a wormhole on the far side of the sun. Curious about the state of things on the dark side of the Sun, they set down and looked around. But I can tell you about that next time. After exploring the Sun for some time, they proceeded on to the wormhole.

Naturally, Ethan was doubting that a spaceship could land on the Sun. "You would think that would be impossible", Nathan said agreeing. But, he claimed, that would be an incorrect assumption. Though this was a teaser. Ethan would have to wait until later to find out about the interesting things Lois and Stitcher discovered while sightseeing on the much cooler and darker side of the Sun.

Ethan indicated that he didn't think there was a dark side of the Sun. But Nathan, intrigued by the idea, told his son he would have to wait, because the story would be epic. Anyway, to sum up some more, after that Lois and Stitcher sold the energy crystals which netted them a boatload of Space credits, which is an interplanetary currency. Then they settled down on the dog planet.

Over the next few months together Lois and Stitcher became friends. This was while relaxing on the sun-drenched beaches, sipping exotic alcoholic beverages, and surfing. It turned out that the waves on this planet were mythic. Lois purchased a high end surf board and spent many hours getting accustomed to the waves on her new planet of residence.

She also purchased an even more revealing string bikini, which she wore most of the time. She also did some nude sunbathing. As it turned out, the Alpha Centauri sun emitted no ultraviolet radiation, so there was zero risk of skin cancer. Nathan wasn't sure that was correct, so he added, "But all disease has been cured by the canid aliens, so, if she did catch cancer, she could take a pill and it would vanish instantly".

As the weeks and months passed Lois felt herself having romantic feeling for the cute alien. Maybe they would hook up and get it on? This is despite me saying earlier Lois was not sexually attracted to Stitcher. He was definitely cute and Lois was thinking she might reconsider her prior conclusion that Stitcher was only worthy of affection in the role of a pet. Or a cute companion.

At this point Ethan felt the need to object. "Wait a minute, dad. That doesn't sound appropriate".

"Very well, son. I'll let this be your call. Lois and Stitcher will not become romantically involved. Obviously, like the Gleepglorps, you see Stitcher as a pet and want him treated as such. As opposed to an equal. You're endorsing the discrimination Stitcher suffered that forced him to resort to murder".

With that Nathan decided to call it a night, telling his son he would conclude the tale with the next bedtime story. Ethan complained, but agreed. It seemed he was really looking forward to the next installment. Nathan departed his son's bedroom, quite satisfied with himself. He and his son were connecting, which bolstered his spirits. He was on his way, he decided, to becoming the favorite parent. He just needed to put in the effort. As opposed to showering his son with gifts. Though that was something he would be willing to consider, if necessary.



 swtd-449ntw-1 AnalysisNext.

Tuesday, September 30, 2025

Princess Poppy Pearce's Precious Possession Is Pilfered


Princess Poppy Pearce of Hlūdrīce swung her legs out from under her silk bedsheets, her dainty bare feet touching the stone tile beside her large four-poster bed. The morning sun streamed in through her bedchamber window on the third floor of castle Pearce, her ancestral home.

She smiled as she anticipated the coming day. Her dreams had been pleasant -- a reminiscence of her recent vacation to the Pleasure Dimension and her dalliance with the handsome prince from an Elles Weorold. Though he said the correct term was Tellus. This had been her first trip, but she left determined to return, despite the steep cost.

At first her father, Brytenwalda Phillip Pearce, was quite angry when he discovered how much of his wealth she had spent. Then he sighed.

"Anything for my beloved daughter, my most precious possession". He pondered the problems this caused. Then arrived at a solution. "I shall issue a royal decree increasing taxes on the citizens of Hlūdrīce". He called for the royal scribe to draft an executive order for delivery to the council of nobles.

"That's more like it!" Poppy screamed. At first she was concerned that she would have to scold her father for his irrationality. She deserved the finest things in life, including a week's vacation in The Dimension Voluptatis (the Pleasure Dimension). A place where a person's hedonistic desires could be indulged in... for a price.

She had not even been aware that Elles Weorolds (alternate dimensions) existed until recently. Her friend, a daughter of one of the realm's most wealthy nobles, clued her in.

"It's the most exclusive club in existence", Lady Serena Hlūdmeolc, daughter of the Duke of Hlūdmeolc claimed.

Intrigued, Poppy decided she had to know more. Soon she found herself initiated into the Voluptas Clava and the existence of Elles Weorolds was revealed. This was a secret that must not ever be disclosed to a commoner, she was told. It was a secreto, that, if betrayed, would bring down on her consequences most severe.

She swore the oath and, after paying a large fee, was accepted into the Voluptatis Collegium (The Society of Pleasure). And, after visiting the royal vault and making a large withdraw, embarked upon her first trip to the Pleasure Dimension.

"I'm ready for my eternal spring water spritz", Poppy informed the attendant. She had previously emerged from her hot oil bath, then received a full body massage from a hunky male aasimar. He kneaded her in all the right places.

"I recommend the eternal spring water spritz", he remarked. "To maintain your astonishing beauty".

Poppy read the brochure and decided this sounded like a very good idea. According to the literature, aqua aeterna granted eternal beauty. Not eternal youth, but the appearance of it. That was as per the fine print, which she read. Still this seemed like a worthwhile purchase.

The attendant smiled approvingly. "I should mention that it is exorbitantly expensive".

Poppy frowned. How dare this mere servant suggest that a VIP such as herself could not afford this magical spritz?

The attendant noticed her frown. "I hear you are a princess. Surely the cost is of no concern to you".

"You got that right", Poppy agreed.

Then an account appeared. A blue aasimar woman materialized in a puff of smoke. After dismissing the attendant the woman informed Poppy that the funds in her account were running low.

Poppy felt like slapping the woman. Though she previously read in the manual that such actions would result in a lifetime ban.

The aasimar woman pushed up her glasses with a finger, then stared at a parchment she had brought with her. "The issue is the somnium gemma you ordered".

Poppy remembered. The salesman told her the dream gem would allow her to relive her most pleasant memories in her dreams. Guaranteed for a lifetime. Upon hearing this she concluded she had to have this gem. Though the choice wasn't between the gem and the spritz. She wanted both, but the cost of the magic water was more than she guessed might be in the entire Pearce royal treasury.

"I can easily afford this", she insisted. Though the accountant didn't seem to believe her. "But I won't pay such an outrageous sum. This is highway robbery!"

Poppy dismissed her. "I just gave a large amount to the orphans", she explained. That sounded plausible. Were there orphans in Hlūdrīce? She thought she remembered that someone told her there were. But that wasn't her concern. It was likely an issue for the council of nobles.

Despite not wanting to depart, her time in Pleasure Dimension was ending. Why she accepted delivery of the somnium gemma. Even though the cost depleted the funds in her account to a negative amount.

"I'm good for it", she assured the accountant aasimar. She signed the promissory note that included full payment in 30 days. With a high amount of interest added to the total. Her father would want her to have this, she reasoned. Her birthday was coming up.

But the somnium gemma, guaranteed for a lifetime, seemed to have malfunctioned. As Princess Poppy sat on the edge of her bed recalling her perfect nocturnal recollections, she realized that, while Poppy and the handsome prince were about to get it on, she could not remember what happened next.

Well, she could remember. She and the handsome prince shared a night of passionate love-making. What she could not remember was reliving it that night. When using the necklace she could relive (via her dreams) past events from her life, experiencing them a second time (or third or fourth time) exactly as they transpired the first time. She could re-experience past events as if they were happening currently.

The night with the prince was a memory she replayed over and over. But the prior night she definitely did not relive this memory in her dreams. Perhaps she should stop payment? She felt around her neck and... to her utter shock, found the gem of dreams was not there. Frantically she searched her royal bed. She stripped off the sheets. Looked underneath her bed base. Removed the mattress. But the gem was gone.

Now she was in a panic. The gem didn't cost a small fortune, it cost an enormous fortune. She began to weep loudly, then she started screaming. This attracted the attention of her personal maid.

A a mousy woman called Beatrice ran into the room. "What is wrong, milady?"

"My dream gem!" Poppy cried, placing her head on the woman's shoulder. Then she thought, what if this peasant stole my gem? She was on call 24-7. In case Poppy suffered any night terrors, she needed someone there to console her. Though the gem, in the short time she had it, did eliminate the night terrors completely.

Another reason why she must find it. She dismissed the maid, then called her back. "You stay with me", she said. She didn't want to give the possible thief an opportunity to make her escape. Though, why would she still be here if she had taken her gem?

Beatrice started trembling. "I swear, I don't know what happened to your gem. Perhaps you could ask the royal mage?" She suggested this in an attempt to be helpful.

Poppy agreed that was a good idea. "We must get to the bottom of this!" she shouted. "The gem didn't evaporate into thin air". Poppy was very worried, given the price of the gem.

The royal mage also looked concerned. He had heard the King raging and cursing when he found out how much his daughter spent on it.

The mage thought. "I can consult my orbuculum". Leofwynn Magus Momenti brought forth a sphere made of crystal, carefully placing it on an ornate iron stand in the middle of the room. "You say you had your expensive necklace when you retired to your bedchamber last night?"

Poppy affirmed that she did.

"A revelare praeterita to reveal the past should work". Clouds swirled within the ball of crystal and coalesced into a scene. Very clearly Poppy could see her bedchamber.

A thought occurred to the princess. "You use this to spy on me? You naughty boy!"

Leofwynn protested. "I would never think of doing such a thing!"

Then, as Poppy, Beatrice and Leofwynn gazed into the crystallum, they saw the events of the previous evening play out. Poppy entered her bedchamber. The moon, visible though her oriel window, shown brightly. Poppy readied herself for bed. She undressed and stood before a full length mirror.

"Look at me", she said aloud, admiring her nude body. "I don't need aqua aeterna. I'm gorgeous!"

Then she called for Beatrice. Beatrice entered the room carrying a silver bucket and several towels. After washing her mistress, the maid helped Poppy into her nightgown.

"I may leave now?" Beatrice asked after tucking Poppy into bed.

"Lay beside me. I insist". Then she smiled. "Please?"

Beatrice complied and, after some time passed, both fell asleep. Or Beatrice did.

"I need to relieve some tension", Poppy remarked, looking over at the snoring Beatrice. She reached between her legs and began to pleasure herself.

Though under the covers, those observing via the crystallum could tell by the look on her face when Poppy orgasmed. And they could hear her moans as she continued pleasuring herself.

"Erm...", Leofwynn muttered nervously.

Poppy smiled. "You're sure you never spied on me previously and observed my nighttime ritual?"

Leofwynn protested. "Of course not". Though he didn't look away. He watched, engaged, until the past Poppy (as shown in the crystallum) orgasmed a second, and then a third time.

"I might not mind if you did", Poppy remarked, grinning wider.

After that, the past Poppy fell sound asleep.

The impatient princess wondered how long this was going to take. "This plays out in real time?"

Leofwynn confirmed that it did. So they continued to watch. A hour later the Beatrice in the crystallum woke and, being careful not to disturb her mistress, tiptoed out of the bedchamber. She did not swipe her slumbering mistresses' necklace.

Again they waited. Then, approximately 20 minutes later, they all saw it. A figure wearing a dark cloak slipped though the oriel window. Moving with the grace of a cat, the small figure approached the soundly slumbering princess and gingerly removed the necklace from around her neck. Then, mere seconds later, the figure departed.

Poppy was alarmed by what she saw. "A child stole my necklace?"

Leofwynn scratched his chin. "No, I would say that likely was a halfling woman".

Poppy exploded in a visceral rage, swearing and screaming for several minutes. The head of security was summoned and informed of what happened. Poppy screamed at him for a while, threating his job and then his life if he did not hunt down the thief and retrieve the gem.

Then the absurdity of what she had just seen hit her. The figure snuck in quietly with extreme stealth. Nobody behaved in this manner in Hlūdrīce (which was also known as The Loud Realm). She pondered for a while what she had seen. Could this thief be someone from the nearby kingdom known as The Silent Land?

Ward Wearde, the head of security and a former military man, agreed it could. "Those whispering bastards!" he exclaimed loudly. "I swear on my life I will hunt down this thief and retrieve your property, Gyden Paloma".

"I should think so", Poppy huffed. "Given that your lax security explains how this happened". On the other hand, she thought, who would have ever guessed that a Swīgeland caitiff would have the audacity to pilfer from the daughter of Brytenwalda Pearce? This was a hanging offense, of that the thief should surely be aware.

Ward suggested that they investigate and, after doing so, found proof he was certain would lead to the culprits. "I have discovered evidence that there were at least 4 of them", he announced when Poppy tracked him down later that afternoon.

"The royal tracker, Findan Nedoute, says he can locate the thieves. He is the ripsnortingest tracker in the land. In fact, he has already set out. He told me that he will leave markers for us to follow until we catch up. The horses are ready and we can depart immediately. With your leave".

Poppy pondered the situation. This necklace was her most valued possession and its retrieval was of utmost importance to her. Therefore, she concluded, she must head the operation to reclaim it herself.

"You, Constable of the Keep Wearde and Magus Momenti Leofwynn shall both accompany me. And we should bring some servicemen with us as well. For my protection".

Ward Wearde, an older, yet extremely fit man in his 60s, protested. "Your father won't hear of it!"

"Pish posh", Poppy proclaimed. "That's not your concern. He will agree. Give me a half hour to prepare. And have my horse ready".

Poppy returned to her bedchamber and packed some belongings. Then she shouted a prayer to Giellan The Hlūd, chief among the screaming deities.

Surely Giellan would hear her plea and grant her request. Soon her deore gim would be back in her possession. And the halfling that took it would pay dearly. Along with anyone else involved in the theft.


Notes: Princess Paloma "Poppy" Pearce resides in the kingdom of Hlūdrīce (aka The Loud Realm in Old English) which is adjacent to Swīgeland aka The Silent Land (Old English translations). Epulae Sumptuosae translates from Latin as "sumptuous/extravagant banquet/feast".

 swtd-448absurd-3 AnalysisPreviousNext.

Thursday, August 21, 2025

Jaeson Gerbille Auditions To Join The Wlitige Beornas


A powerful bolt of lightning split the boulder in two. There was a loud boom as shards of rock flew through the air. Tavish, the handsome warrior, was truly impressed. How was it that this diminutive rodent could do this?

"Zounds!" He whispered. Other members of the party applauded. Everyone, it seemed, was truly impressed.

The red-haired cleric Oona folded her arms. "It is between Jaeson and Bob Smith".

Bob, a wiry man with a slender black mustache, smiled. There was no way this tiny rat would be chosen over him.

Although, he had to admit, the display of magick he had just witnessed was astonishing.

Two other contenders for admission into the adventuring party expressed their disappointment and departed. Fillroy, the local blacksmith's son who dreamt of a life of adventure sighed. It was a deep defeated sigh of acceptance.

This, after he had clearly wowed them with his card trick, drawing the king of hearts from the deck. "Is this your card?" he asked. The dim-witted warrior had to admit it was.

Tavish raised his sword. “I vote for Phillip!” How did the lad guess his card? Mind reading, possibly?

But he changed his vote when Bob Smith, a mysterious figure dressed all in black, snatched an arrow right out of the air fired by their elven archer, Tvisha. She claimed she could nick his ear at 20 paces. Perhaps she could have, but at the last second he reached out and grabbed the high speed projectile.

"I change my vote to Bob!" Tavish shouted enthusiastically.

"I could do that", the halfling woman named Viv claimed. Tavish scoffed.

"Well, maybe", he conceded. He had seen the small rogue perform some impressive feats of dexterity. Like the time she walked a tightrope over a castle moat and stole the princess's diamond necklace from her bedchamber.

Tavish gave a firm nod. "Bob is my man all the way".

Bob looked appreciative. He smiled. "Thank you very much, Mister Tavish".

Oona glanced around the clearing. "Are there any other contenders?" She saw no one, but asked to be sure.

All four members of the Wlitige Beornas (aka the Beautiful Heroes) suppressed a laugh when a small rodent wearing a blue tunic announced he was there to audition. But he claimed he had what it took.

Oona, the leader of the party, giggled, assuming it was a joke.

"I am Jaeson Gerbille, the Wizard of Wesselville. As I will now demonstrate, I am, of the four candidates, the far superior one".

Tavish chuckled. He also assumed this must be a prank. Probably perpetrated by Viv. She was constantly trying to pull one over on him or another member of the party. But mostly him. They had an ongoing rivalry wherein each continually tried to out prank the other.

The mouse jumped up on a stump in the middle of the forest clearing and withdrew a tiny wand made of willow from a sheath attached to his belt.

"Behold!" he bellowed. He pointed the stick at a nearby moss covered boulder. Which, as previously disclosed, produced a bolt of lightning that split the enormous rock in twain.

Oona the cleric, Viv the halfling rogue, Tvisha the elven archer, and Tavish the ruggedly attractive swordsman all were inclined to agree -- this small guinea pig was now the leading candidate. Unless Bob could wow them with an even more astounding feat.

"I am a gerbil, not a guinea pig", Jaeson said, correcting the adventures. "Prepare to be amazed!"

Everyone, Bob included, waited with bated breath. What would this furry enigma do next?

Turns out, nothing.

"Are you ready?" Jaeson squeaked.

Everyone confirmed they were.

The two-foot-tall rodent began to shrink. Suddenly he diminished to a mere 6 inches in height, his tunic and wand also shrinking proportionally in size.

Everyone clapped and voiced approval. Excepting Bob. After this did they even need to see how Bob could possibly top this trick? Previously the heroes had agreed that what they likely needed was a magick user.

"What is your specialty, Bob?" Oona inquired.

"You said you were looking for an individual proficient in the use of magick, and that I am", Bob asserted. "Though it seems I have been outdone".

"Don't give up", Tavish counseled. "Let's see what you got".

"Very well", Bob replied.

Bob closed his eyes, seemingly concentrating. Then he began to levitate, rising 2 feet off the ground, his black cloak billowing dramatically. He hung there, in midair, for several seconds. The seconds ticked by and he continued to hover.

"Higher!" Jaeson squeaked, encouraging Bob. He wanted to see him soar over the treetops.

Beads of sweat appeared on Bob's forehead. But, instead of levitating higher, began to descend, until he returned to the ground. Bob let out a defeated sigh, then stood there, loudly huffing as if he had just sprinted a marathon.

Jaeson puffed out his chest. "Looks like we have a winner -- me!"

Bob hung his head in shame. After wiping the sweat from his brow. "I did my best", he concluded. "I can see why you would choose this mouse over me. However, you may consider the fact that he is but a small rodent, while I am a man? And I'm capable of using a dagger".

Bob drew a dagger from his black leather boot and tossed it from hand to hand. Then he drew back his arm and threw it. Flying through the air, the poniard appeared to hit its mark, sticking with a thunk in the trunk of a nearby tree.

"Hmm", Tavish mused, deep in thought. "Why can't we add both Bob and Jaeson to the party?"

The party members conferred. Bob and Jaeson heard them whispering as they huddled.

Tavish suddenly shouted, "That would be a big mistake, in my opinion!"

Eventually it seemed a decision had been reached. Tavish approached Bob and extended his hand. Bob, anticipating a congratulatory handshake to welcome him to the group, extended his hand.

"I argued passionately in favor of your inclusion, but you didn't make the cut. I'm so sorry", Tavish said, giving Bob a conciliatory handshake.

Bob looked genuinely disappointed. But he understood, he said. The Wlitige Beornas were well known in these parts as the saviors of Stincantun, the nearby village he was from. He had heard the tales of how the heroes had defeated the gobelin horde. Many related the tale of how Tavish himself had defeated the gobelin cyng in battle.

Bob was about to depart when the warrior began to grin. "Just kidding!" he chuckled.

"Both Bob and Jaeson will be admitted on a provisional basis", Oona announced.

"Ha, ha", Bob laughed, remembering that Tavish was known for his predisposition for pranking. Supposedly, as per the version of the tale he heard, Tavish roughly pulled down the gobelin cyng's breeches after stunning him with a solid punch to the gut.

"Indeed", Tavish confirmed. "That took him by surprise. He tripped and fell to his knees, then I gave him a noogie. Though that might have been a mistake, given how greasy the cyng's lice-infested hair was". The warrior laughed, then let out a disgusted "ugh" when he came to the part about the noogie and the greasy hair.

"After he begged for his life and I spared it, he was beaten mercilessly by his subordinates. Tvisha shot a number in the back as they fled. I don't think they will return".

"I doubt they will", Tvisha agreed. "But, if they decide to make that grave mistake, they will have the Wlitige Beornas to contend with".

"The town is forever in your debt", Bob remarked. "I am truly honored to be added to your ranks. I will work hard not to disappoint".

Jaeson did not look impressed. "I have never heard that tale", he interjected. "I was passing through on my way back to Wesselville when I saw your notice on the bulletin board at the local tavern. The barkeep claimed you are local heroes, so I decided to check you out. By the way, I also asked why your town stinks. He says the reason is a huge cesspool that Stincantun is downwind of?"

Viv wrinkled her nose. What the rodent said was true. The Slughe Fen was located upwind of the city. Though it had not always stunk. She knew this personally because she had lived there for many years. Some said an yfel wicca was the source of the stench. The word around town was that this wizard was conducting foul experiments.

Another group of adventurers, some inexperienced locals, had investigated, but never returned. Only recently (several years ago) had the village come to be known as Stincantun (stinky town). The true name of the village was Lustbære, which described it succinctly. It was a very desirable, pleasant, cheerful, and joyous place to live. Before the dark (and smelly) times.

"Before accepting our offer, you should know what our mission entails", Oona stated before Jaeson indicated whether or not he accepted. To her, it sounded like he might not be interested after all. Given that the mission involved investigating the Slughe Fen and finding out the truth behind the horrific reek. And, if it was a yfel wicca who was responsible, then to slay him.

Or extract from him concessions in exchange for his life. Which would obviously include abating the smell, if possible. There would also attempt to locate the prior adventurers who had disappeared.

Bob, an inhabitant of Stincantun (formerly Lustbære) readily agreed. Many inhabitants had already fled, packing up their belongings and relocating elsewhere. Bob was among those who decided to stick it out.

"This is a noble quest", Bob concluded. "I readily accept".

"Why not?" Jaeson, whiskers twitching, squeaked as he shrugged his shoulders. "There isn't currently anything on my agenda". Then he thought. "I will join the team on a provisional basis". Depending on how bad this smell was, the gerbil thought. In town it had been mildly distracting. A foul stench in the wind, sometimes hardly noticeable and sometimes so bad it made his eyes water. How much worse would be if they sought out the source?

"It is settled then", Tavish declared. "Congratulations, Bob", he said, clapping the man on the back. "This is a great honor for you both", he added, addressing Bob and Jaeson.

"We shall depart on the morn", Viv said. She was stirring a pot on the party's campfire. "You are both welcome to some of my rutabaga and parsley root stew". The halfling woman spooned some stew into a copper stein, offering it up for any takers.

Tavish took the stein and drank from the cup, after blowing on it to cool it off. "I'm famished", the handsome warrior remarked after slurping some soup. "This isn't bad", he concluded as he took a seat on the same stump Jaeson had previously stood upon.

Actually still was. "Excuse me", Tavish apologized as Jaeson jumped from his perch to avoid the warrior's descending posterior.

Jaeson expressed interest in the stew. "I take it the stew is vegan? I could scrounge up some mealworms, waxworms or crickets to add".

This idea didn't appeal to Bob, nor anyone else. "None for me, thanks", Bob replied. "With your permission I will return home to gather the rest of my gear. Also to tell my sister the news. She knows I was auditioning to join your group, but doesn't know of my acceptance".

"That sounds like a plan", Oona said, nodding her head. "Be back at dawn, for that is when we shall depart".

Bob agreed and left, disappearing into the trees, following a path out of the glen and into the woods, back in the direction of Stincantun. Meanwhile, Jaeson began digging in the soft soil around the base of the rotting stump. There were woodworms here for certain. He could smell them.

 swtd-447absurd-2 AnalysisPreviousNext.