Sunday, January 29, 2012

Musclelaneous 110

The one who cannot restrain their anger will wish undone, what their temper and irritation prompted them to do ~ Horace (12/8 65 BC to 11/27 8 BC) the leading Roman lyric poet during the time of Augustus.

"That was 110 gold pieces wasted" William the Moderate exclaimed as he exited the temple of the oracles. "What did the oracle say?" inquired Suri the disfigured mage. "She told me that there is no way I can be made whole again, excepting very powerful magics", William muttered dejectedly. "A regeneration spell, a Wish, or a magical item that allows for either of the two". "That is a tall order", Suri agreed. "But if we were to track down such magic it's possible we could use it to restore us both. I could be beautiful once again, and your love muscle might be regenerated".

"We've been adventuring many a year and never have we encountered magic of that nature. It's a hopeless cause", William concluded. "Didn't you ask the oracle how, or if, such a feat could be accomplished?" Suri asked. "I would have", responded William, but the Oracle waved me away. Her vision had ended and she could tell me no more. At least that's what she said. Clearly what she meant was that I needed to pony up another 110 gold pieces. I have only enough left for a meal and a room at the Inn tonight".

"Very well. I shall ask the oracle. I also do not have enough gold pieces, but I have some items I can exchange for gold at the local pawnshop. Let us go there now". But William wasn't quite ready to leave. He stopped Suri, saying, "I never should have let you talk me into this. You know I place little faith in the gods". Suri frowned. How could anyone be so agnostic when the proof of the existence of the gods was all around them? William himself had been the recipient of spells of healing from their former adventuring companion, Joshua the brutally murdered cleric.

"Your lack of faith astounds me William. How can you disbelieve the Gods existence considering all the times Joshua saved your life with his healing prayers?". William huffed, "does your magic come from the Gods? No. And I don't believe a cleric's magic does either. Wherever magic comes from I seriously doubt it is from some all-powerful being... Did Joshua's god save him when he was sacrificed at the Croaker altar?"

"Wait a minute!" Suri exclaimed. "Joshua's death was your fault! If you had not desecrated the Caecilanite temple by whizzing in the holy reflecting pool their cleric would not have demanded a sacrifice". "I've taken full responsibility for that", William protested. "Luckily for you I thought I was in love with you at the time, otherwise I might have pointed at you when the Croaker cleric demanded to know who was responsible".

"I should have killed you for that" Suri retorted angrily. "Because you possessed the earwig of interpretation, and due to the fact Caecilanoids can't tell one human from another, you shifted the blame to Joshua and he died in your place!" Suri shouted, her face growing red. "Now that I think about it, I'd say it's poetic justice that you lost your manhood".

"I don't believe I should have died a horrible death due to an innocent mistake. Also, I expected either you or Joshua would cast a spell and save the day". This further enraged Suri who practically shouted, "You think it's my fault? William, I know you never liked Joshua, his being half-elven and a cleric. And then when you found out about our affair...".

"Oh, so now I'm a racist?" William interrupted. "I doubt Joshua was even a quarter elven. Except for his slightly pointy ears and chiseled good looks, you could hardly tell he had any elf blood. Yes, I was jealous, but I most certainly did not want to see him brutally sacrificed".

Just then a pudgy priest dressed in black robes approached them. "You must be quite" he insisted. "Shouting is not allowed on temple grounds" the man cautioned, pointing his finger at William. William had had enough, and it was at that moment that he blew his stack and punched the priest in the nose. The priest screamed and staggered backward, blood spraying from his shattered sniffer. Tripping over his own feet, the priest fell and violently hit his head on the stone pavement.

"Oops, I didn't mean to do that", William remarked as Suri starred in horror at the unmoving priest. "I think you killed him", Suri proclaimed. "I think you're right" William agreed, nudging the downed priest with his boot. Looking around to see if anyone had witnessed the assault, and verifying no one had, William suggested, "Let's get the hell out of here!". With that the two companions raced down the temple steps, across the sanctuary grounds, and through the iron gate they had entered when first arriving at the temple of the oracles.

SWTD #102, WTM #2.